Dear Mary...
No, that's not quite right... oh well...
It does appear that Mary Cheney is finally ready for her 15 minutes of fame.
I hesitate to comment, because frankly, I'm ambivalent.
It's like being in a bar and starting up a conversation with someone you find attractive - only to find your mind wandering as soon as they start the second sentence of their life story. I'm not that I'm not empathetic. It's just that I don't care.
While I agree her story has played out on a somewhat grander - and seemingly more public scale than most of us, but that's really the only difference.
Coming out stories are personal - sometimes funny or illuminating, sometimes horrific and heartbreaking - and if the timing and circumstances are right, they can reel us in.
The stories that get to us - especially those of us who are gay - are the ones where the parallels and connections to our own lives make it easier to see through the other person's eyes. And the good ones invariably (like any good parable) teach - about overcoming fear, prejudice, and hate or about the enduring power of unconditional love.
Mary's story - from what I've read and seen in interviews - has none of those elements.
Crashed car... came out... parents accepted me... end of story... moving on... nothing to see here.
I'm glad she had few problems with her parents about it. Hooray for her. Not everyone is so lucky.
Unfortunately the rest of her story seems to be more about sublimation that anything else. For years, the Cheney standard response was denial and offense that anyone would have the temerity to talk about the elephant in the room. Acceptance and unconditional love mean standing up, not deferring.
I - and most gay people - understand the journey. The struggle to know where it's (perceived to be) safe to be open about yourself is a common one. Many people have walked the multiple-personality path: gay in your "private life"; don't ask, don't tell with the family; silent at work. Been there, done that. Hell - I work for an oil company. It's not the kind of place one would expect to find a gay-friendly or nurturing environment.
But I also know something about leading change. Yes, part of leading change is - as Mary put it - just being yourself and living your life. That's important. But equally important is doing the right thing when you reach those "teachable moments".
As I said, I work for an oil company. I also - through happenstance more than anything - am the President of the GLBT employee group. It's from that vantage point that I've been able to see and hear many wonderful life stories and see my company evolve into a leader in LGBT workplace equality. (If you still need a hint... HRC Corporate Equality Index = 100%; Fortune 100 = #4; stock ticker = CVX)
If there is one lesson that can be gleaned from my experience, it is to never underestimate the power of our own stories to inspire change. Over and over, we see that power in those "teachable moments" and daily acts of courage -- of becoming visible -- expecting nothing more extraordinary than equal treatment and equal rights.
Many of biggest strides to equality have often come from ordinary people who go to work each day, build bridges, and change the hearts and minds of their co-workers. But there are also moments when those in position of privilege have the opportunity - and the obligation - to step up, no matter how uncomfortable.
Those are stories worth telling.
Oh - I'm sorry Mary... were you saying something?